Post by experimental on Oct 28, 2017 5:26:30 GMT
i'm wondering if you have had experiences volunteering and what you thought of it? whether it be for fun, to help out, or if you needed to for 'work experience'.
I volunteered last year in the lead-up to xmas. I hoped it'd be fun and to meet people outside of my regular circle (that i'm not close to). I hoped to bring out the more relaxed playful non-conforming side of me maybe.
But it was a little disappointing. I used to volunteer a lot at uni and that was mostly to get away from my (abusive) home, and I found most people to be very open and creative and energised in those kinds of volunteering. But as an adult, I dunno, it seemed really limited and un-fun. people seemed homogenous and I didn't fit in. 1/3 were older ladies who weren't really up for talking except for the friends they came with. the other 2/3 were through corporate programs, where they're doing it as a part of their workplace. people seemed surprised to hear that I just wanted to do something different, and wanted to give my time and talk to people and wrap presents and was interested in things.
Had to squash littles away cos at first sight the toys were way too fun and I pushed them away. was sad cos I hadn't done that to parts in ages since it was all about sharing time and letting everyone to the front. Then the occasion didn't seem right to let anybody even inch forward anymore so it was bland and dull.
I dunno if i'm being pessimistic or negative, wonder if I should give it another chance. it just didn't have the fun of volunteering that I wanted it to be. it didn't really have a spirit of giving, either. just like, idle bored women hanging out with 1-2 existing friends and already having this closed mentality about xmas and about people in need or what have you, appropriateness of toys etc. I feel like a Grinch, hey. nobody had a curiosity about each other but I dunno if it's just me. My brain/concussion symptoms were pretty bad too, it disrupts my ability to talk to people and act normal/approachable. But still. I was so deflated. People complained about bags being different and petty stuff. Oh and I freaking hate the bog-down of charity culture sometimes. Giving is free, yknow, don't make it so hard. But idealism/disillusionment, yknow. (Hey lionne I miss you, heh )
I have other skills too. A year back I contacted 2 places offering to volunteer when they didn't have a formal program for it. 1 place never replied and the other one replied late and was pretty lacklustre. I didn't end up going. It just kind of said... yeah call us and we can see if we have anything you wanna do. Why is everything nice in the world so eroded into something crap? I don't want a line on my resume or whatever, I actually want to do things to contribute cos I like the look of some things, it interests me and I care. Is that so foreign?
I have skills to give in areas that they wouldn't recruit for.
It's sad, like, I wonder if my littles are too forefront or if these ideals are too immature for the real world. Like it doesn't fit into the world and I must change or grow more before it can find a place, in a tamed-down and modified way. It shouldn't be like that yknow. There are established ways of volunteering (and of charity fundraising, for that matter) that are just so tired and routine and god forbid you feel fresh enough to offer something and nobody cares or can see it. I mean I can put on my adult boots and shape it into a better format maybe, make the ideal take-able and not broken, but that's more effort and how much is that gonna last? It's not littles-friendly either. Then I think so many organisations and causes are fundamentally broken inside and would have had good intentions or good beginnings and I get jaded about everything.
Last year I experimented with telling people that i'm willingly spending the holidays alone and that I like it. And thankyou for inviting me but no thank you. And that is already on the limit of what people can accept and tolerate without alienating yourself completely. Like why. I don't wanna grow up in this world.
I volunteered last year in the lead-up to xmas. I hoped it'd be fun and to meet people outside of my regular circle (that i'm not close to). I hoped to bring out the more relaxed playful non-conforming side of me maybe.
But it was a little disappointing. I used to volunteer a lot at uni and that was mostly to get away from my (abusive) home, and I found most people to be very open and creative and energised in those kinds of volunteering. But as an adult, I dunno, it seemed really limited and un-fun. people seemed homogenous and I didn't fit in. 1/3 were older ladies who weren't really up for talking except for the friends they came with. the other 2/3 were through corporate programs, where they're doing it as a part of their workplace. people seemed surprised to hear that I just wanted to do something different, and wanted to give my time and talk to people and wrap presents and was interested in things.
Had to squash littles away cos at first sight the toys were way too fun and I pushed them away. was sad cos I hadn't done that to parts in ages since it was all about sharing time and letting everyone to the front. Then the occasion didn't seem right to let anybody even inch forward anymore so it was bland and dull.
I dunno if i'm being pessimistic or negative, wonder if I should give it another chance. it just didn't have the fun of volunteering that I wanted it to be. it didn't really have a spirit of giving, either. just like, idle bored women hanging out with 1-2 existing friends and already having this closed mentality about xmas and about people in need or what have you, appropriateness of toys etc. I feel like a Grinch, hey. nobody had a curiosity about each other but I dunno if it's just me. My brain/concussion symptoms were pretty bad too, it disrupts my ability to talk to people and act normal/approachable. But still. I was so deflated. People complained about bags being different and petty stuff. Oh and I freaking hate the bog-down of charity culture sometimes. Giving is free, yknow, don't make it so hard. But idealism/disillusionment, yknow. (Hey lionne I miss you, heh )
I have other skills too. A year back I contacted 2 places offering to volunteer when they didn't have a formal program for it. 1 place never replied and the other one replied late and was pretty lacklustre. I didn't end up going. It just kind of said... yeah call us and we can see if we have anything you wanna do. Why is everything nice in the world so eroded into something crap? I don't want a line on my resume or whatever, I actually want to do things to contribute cos I like the look of some things, it interests me and I care. Is that so foreign?
I have skills to give in areas that they wouldn't recruit for.
It's sad, like, I wonder if my littles are too forefront or if these ideals are too immature for the real world. Like it doesn't fit into the world and I must change or grow more before it can find a place, in a tamed-down and modified way. It shouldn't be like that yknow. There are established ways of volunteering (and of charity fundraising, for that matter) that are just so tired and routine and god forbid you feel fresh enough to offer something and nobody cares or can see it. I mean I can put on my adult boots and shape it into a better format maybe, make the ideal take-able and not broken, but that's more effort and how much is that gonna last? It's not littles-friendly either. Then I think so many organisations and causes are fundamentally broken inside and would have had good intentions or good beginnings and I get jaded about everything.
Last year I experimented with telling people that i'm willingly spending the holidays alone and that I like it. And thankyou for inviting me but no thank you. And that is already on the limit of what people can accept and tolerate without alienating yourself completely. Like why. I don't wanna grow up in this world.